$2800 and $20

1.

He decided to pay $2800 for premium processing. $2800 is quite a lot, but it sets him free. To some extend, money indeed can buy freedom and save time. It was not until a few minutes after he confirmed his decision with the lawyers that he started feeling relieved more than just money-wise ‘calculating’.

A few days before making up his mind, he felt frustrated and all disappointment had nowhere to go. He even didn’t know what exactly he was disappointed about. It was true that “$2800 is quite a lot” hovered around in his mind. Remember those blimp or jet advertising, dragging the banner in the air.

It was not until 20 minutes before his lawyer got his email that he realized that the best timing to plant a tree is 10 years ago, and the second best is now.

As soon as he made the payment, he dismissed the thought ‘I should have done this in June’ and ‘$, Goddamnit’.

He is feeling good now. And I hope so.

2.

《En agosto nos vemos (我们八月见)》

她惊恐地转头看去,可他已经不在了。浴室里也没有他的身影。她打开大灯,发现他的衣服也不在原处了,而她乱丢在地上的衣服已经被他带着几近爱意的情感叠好放在了椅子上。直到这时,她才发现自己对他一无所知,甚至连他的名字也不知道,那个疯狂的夜晚留给她的,只有暴风雨净化之后的空气中依旧弥漫着的悲伤的薰衣草香。她从床头柜上拿起自己的书准备塞进行李箱,这时发现,在那本惊悚小说的书页中间,夹了一张他留给她的二十美元钞票。

然而,她还得花上几天才能意识到,真正变了的不是这个世界,而是她自己,她一直在生活着,却从没观察过生活,只是那一年从岛上回来后,她才开始用批判的目光审视自己的日子。尽管她并没意识到造成这些变化的原因,可夹在书里116页的那张二十美元钞票应该与此脱不了干系。它带来一种难以忍受的屈辱感,使她得不到片刻安宁。她愤怒地哭过,因无法得知那个男人的名字感到挫败,恨不得杀了他,因为他玷污了那场幸福冒险的回忆。在海上航行期间,她同自己妥协了,那次无爱的逢场作戏只是她和丈夫之间的私事,但是她难以抑制二十美元代表的欲望,那张钞票就像一团炙热的炭火不停燃烧,与其说在钱包里燃烧,不如说在她心里灼烧。她不知道该把它当作战利品裱起来,还是该毁掉以平息怒火。在她看来唯一不妥的做法就是花掉它。